With only one week left, I finally understand and realize why some counselors are drawn to some campers and what makes us feel so connected to each other.
There's a need to be needed that lives within my soul. I never really connect with my campers that don't need me as much but I always have an incredibly large soft spot for those that do need me. What I mean is, I have to be able to care for someone in order to not only feel useful but also, to feel bonded. I know that all of my campers need me to some regard, but it's the ones that depend on my assistance that I feel closer to. When I take time off, I always miss and think most about those campers who require just a bit more attention.
However, I am not that counselor that can often be found in close proximity to her campers, meaning I don’t often comfort or console my campers through hug or touch. This is a greater difference that I’ve noticed. There are those counselors who enjoy the physical bonding as much as their campers do, but I can never find it to be anything more than awkward. It has nothing to do with personal space either, it has to do with my not needing to have a physical connection in order to feel connected. I know that campers can sense this from me because only a few have ever tried to test that. It’s ok though, there is always another counselor that is able to fulfill that role and I am always there to care for campers in a different way.
This week though, was a week of firsts:
-first male cabin of the summer
-first week with 90% personal cares
-first week to be needed in every capacity (read above)
-first week to recognize and understand why those differences are so important.
Anyway, so ends week 7 of my 8 week journey. Anticipating my last week in Minnesota leaves me both relieved and sad. I am about to prepare for the last week knowing that I can be both types of counselor – thanks to a man named Chad.
Until next time,
Courtney Chivon
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